possibilities...

[dwivian]

So, what could I do for you today?

Comments

[jost.livejournal.com]

Jump down, turn around and pick a bale of cotton. And be sure to keep Ms. Scarlett away from the Union troops.

[dwivian]

While I can jump down and turn around, surely you know that King Cotton doesn't come in until late August. All I'd have now is a bale of seedlings, which aren't good for much except replanting, and prayer that the roots take.

On your suggestion I dispatched Ms. Scarlett back to her home in the escourt of the Army of the Potomac, under the watchful eyes of Gen. Joseph Hooker. Are you suggesting this was bad advice on your part? If so, I believe he is on his way Chancellorsville.

[librarygal.livejournal.com]

Make my cold go away.

[dwivian]

I have cast a spell that will relieve you of this cold after 96 hours. Never fear! And drink plenty of Minute Maid Orange Juice.

[librarygal.livejournal.com]

Hey...last night was 96 hours! And OJ makes my sore throat hurt worse :(

[dwivian]

You sure you have a cold? Chicken soup is always a good thing....

::worries::

[librarygal.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I'm sure. I caught it from my husband! I think it's just worse because I'm pregnant. And for the same reason, chicken now makes me nauseous :(

[dwivian]

Ah, yes.... pregnancy can do that. And, this without posting pictures of how big your boobs have gotten, describing the new maternity tent dress you just found, or detailing exactly why anything but saltines and water are evil....

Soon you'll be better. Just don't let it go without seeing a doctor! Early development issues can arise if you're feverish, so says my panicky books...

[librarygal.livejournal.com]

I'm actually kind of annoyed, because my cold was much better yesterday, but today it seems to have gotten worse. I have a doctor appt on Tuesday anyway (first time to hear the baby's heartbeat, hopefully!), so if I'm not feeling better by then, then they can see if I need some antibiotics or something.

(Oh, and I took my temp for the heck of it, and I may have a very slight fever, but it's also really hot in our apartment, so I'm not too worried about it. I did take some Tylenol to see if that would bring it down.)

[dwivian]

Stay careful, but get better!

....are we going to get the once-a-month profile shot of the expanding belly? It's tradition, you know... ::hee!::

[librarygal.livejournal.com]

Heh, maybe once the belly starts expanding :) At this point, if anything, I've lost weight thanks to morning sickness. I imagine I'll start gaining within the next month or so, though...

[dwivian]

You need the first few months for contrast. That's also when the boob fairy settles in...

[librarygal.livejournal.com]

The boob fairy has definitely been here! Sadly, I got pregnant the month I also spent $60 on new bras :(

[dwivian]

Save them for later, I guess....

I have no idea what to do about NEW new bras... do you go ahead and buy maternity/nursing bras? Or do you wait it out until the end? It's all confusing to someone who hopes to never need one...

[shes-precious.livejournal.com]

Pay for someone to steam clean the carpets at the house I'm trying to sell as well as clean the house inside/out so it looks presentable.

[dwivian]

Hm.... on my budget, I can pay for cleaning, but I doubt things will look presentable on the other side. But, you'll have a half-assed job done! What more could any American want?

[hougirl79.livejournal.com]

I need a good fertility spell... :)

[dwivian]

Hm....

Ovulate Left
Ovulate Right
Stand up
Squat Down
Do It Right!

Or, is cheerleading kinda distracting? I'll try not to put the pom-poms in your face too much....

[hougirl79.livejournal.com]

lol.. I was kinda hopeing you knew of a spell :( oh well that'll do. I'll just keep doing what I am doing.

[dwivian]

As an Orthodox Christian type, I'm not normally able to pass along stuff like that, but I do have quite the library of religious materials. I'll see what I have. We'll start with Spiral Dance and work outwards. :)

[hougirl79.livejournal.com]

lol ok...

[dwivian]

Okay.....

Apparently, the invokation of your favorite fertility goddess is a necessary part of the rituals, as I can't find any strictly world-magic ones.

After the invitation of the deity, praise of their abilities in bringing fertility to the earth (this ritual is best done in the height of spring, or dead of winter to call spring into being), a petition is made for your own fertility. The ritual should be at mid-cycle, so that you don't bring blood near the altar, and should be immediately followed with tantric (or otherwise holy) sex for a week, two to three times a day. The outcome of such a coupling is dedicated to the deity, however, so this fertility rite comes with a price.

I'm somewhat convinced, though, that constant sex mid-cycle is a good way to get knocked up, so I'm not so sure how much of the trappings of rubric are required.

Have you talked to a doctor about any issues? I have lots of friends with PCOS, which causes a lot of infertility concerns, I'm told. There are also plenty of other things that can be a problem, including HIS motility numbers. Worth having a consultation, I'd think.

[hougirl79.livejournal.com]

We've gone to a dr concerning this but I feel anything extra could help. :)

I asked Goddess Diana everday to help bless our house with children and I thank her each day when my cycle comes because it is VERY irregular. As far as the sex three times daily mid-cycle that would be hard since hardly EVER wants it. We've been having problems in this area and I've told him that it's probably what's been hurting our baby making time the greatest. I don't think he understands how vital it is. He just wants a kid and thinks they grow on trees. lol... anyways, I'm willing to try anything. =)

[cavalaxis]

::opens mouth to speak::

::thinks better of it::

[dwivian]

::closes your mouth for you::

See? I'm useful!

[cavalaxis]

::biting tongue::

Yes, yes you are.

My headspace is just three degrees SSW of NSFW today.

[dwivian]

Ow! No biting your tongue! You'll end up all swollen, and it'll hurt!

[sumobabe.livejournal.com]

Iced coffee.

Or, tell me something that will make me happy.

[dwivian]

I have no coffee. Dunno if that would make you happy to hear....

...hm.... I *DO* have some tomato plants that are thriving, though!

[sumobabe.livejournal.com]

Plum tomatoes that you might sun dry? Or regular round ones that might be made into some delicious tomato sauce or some yummy vegetable soup? Those are happy things.

[dwivian]

I think these are going to be regular type tomatos, but they can be scooped out and dried in the oven like the roma were....

[terrilyn.livejournal.com]

Make me understand the whole that is websphere and java without my head exploding.

That would make me estatic!

[dwivian]

I can assure you that all you'll have is quite a headache, and eventual understanding, but no actual explosions, much as you will desire them before you're done dealing with the issue of the XML uploads....

[football-swan.livejournal.com]

Tell me why Coke Zero isn't sold where I live in the half-liter bottles. It is where I am right now....

[dwivian]

The Atlanta regional market, serviced by Coca Cola Enterprises as the principle bottler, has found from market tests that Coca Cola Zero sells best in the 20oz bottle. However, 1/2 litre bottles are available, and are sold via gas stations and similar vendors. A major U.S. Retailer that handles their own shipping is working to sell 1/2 litre bottles of just about every product in their stores for summer -- we'll see if they move into the Atlanta area with this sales test.

[football-swan.livejournal.com]

Thanks - I'm hoping to get back to the store where I found them, and get a few packs before I come home.